Had a dream last night that I was walking in Queen Anne in Seattle in some residential area on the hill quite late at night. A large man came out of nowhere and tried to garrotte me. He got the wire over my head then tried to shove some kind of wafer into my mouth as I attempted to yell. He looked happy, like he had successfully done this many times and was thrilled to be doing one of his favorite things. His energy was very predator/prey and I felt almost hypnotized to "cooperate". I looked at his face, at the wafer, at the garrotte as I almost started to fall back into bushes and I felt in every cell of my body "remember who you are". Instantly, I fully embodied the situation, thrusting my hand to his throat and fighting him. He was surprised, like he couldn't believe I came out from his spell. I got away and, as I ran, was overcome with a need to sleep, like I had been drugged. I called my boyfriend and tried to tell him what happened, that I needed him to come pick me up. I had no idea where I was and told him the closest street was the cross section of 20th and 40th and thinking how stupid it was to name both streets numerically. Then I found a place to hide and crawled into it as I fought trying to not sleep. I forced myself to stay alert.
I woke at 5 am.
I always think about my dreams, feel into them. This one had an otherworldly feel to it, like a spirit encounter of sorts. I could certainly look at it like I was being "attacked". But it felt more like training.
Most modern humans ARE hypnotized to cooperate with dominant cultural paradigms and norms. Many people reflexively react the way they are "supposed to" then later wonder why they did or said certain things. There is a potent indoctrination here.
My dream felt like a spirit helping me break that spell in a very serious situation and find my power and voice to not capitulate and be victimized or held captive by it.
In my dream, the man was MUCH bigger than me. But I was more powerful.
And that's how we break the spell - by remembering, and rooting into, true power.
But you have to know what power is. And you have to know what soil you are rooting into. That man was using force. His power was confined to that force. My power was much greater BECAUSE of what I am rooted into. I was not immune to him. But I was not overtaken by him. And that makes all the difference.
I walk this path for many reasons. Power is one of them. Not force. Power. Not dominance. Power. I embrace the reality of predator/prey and I can tell the difference between a true predator and someone who is merely predatory. That man in my dream was predatory casting the spell of being a predator, eliciting in me the response of being preyed upon. But I am not prey and I am very clear in myself about that truth, so his spell did not work.
Too many people participate in predatory/victim dynamics because they have no roots in real power. They are confused in themselves. They erase predator/prey reality with their denial and cut themselves off from primal power, creating the inevitability of predatory/victim because they are living in a false construction, using rules they made up, claiming them to be truths. The insistence upon compassion, for example, dulls people to the signals of bad intent. People then are confused, caught in the conflict between their instinct and the wisdom it contains, and their indoctrination, telling them to make space or tolerate what is harmful. This means that people who are doing the harm can ramp up their bs because there is no natural response and their behavior is "allowed" because of this supposed morality or compassion or other 'virtue".
In this way, we cannot access true power because we are confused, hypnotized, to participate in a false construction, believing it to be the way.
This makes us not trust ourselves, acting like there is a "right way" to be a human, instead of trusting both the responsive arising in us AND our own, for want of a better word, goodness. People are made to believe that their instinct is not to be trusted because some evil is lurking in them just waiting to come out and that they should replace instinctive arising with certain rules and values and morals god-knows-who decided were right. By disdaining our place in nature, we become confused, thinking we have more, or less, power than we actually do and enact this "power" in distorted ways. We are, collectively, disoriented. So we run from teacher to teacher, practice to practice, trying to find the "truth" we can live from.
There is no truth but the truth that arises from Deeper Intelligence in you as life unfolds. This will teach you. But we, hypnotized and disoriented, do not trust this and wander this world lost.
Break the spell people. That is your work.
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